You can escape your children

• It may seem like a waste to get a spa of this size and not let your children use it with you, but you deserve to have your own oasis. They can use it tomorrow.

You can finally get your wife off your back

• You know what they say, “Happy wife, happy life.” Once you get her a Marquis, you’ll forget what it’s like to be unhappy.

You can shut your husband up

• Who are we kidding? This is impossible. At least you’ll be so relaxed in your Marquis that you’ll forget he’s even there.

You deserve massage day (c’mon guys, you know you want one too).

• Just drive around the block to make it seem like you’re going somewhere special, and voila massage day in your own backyard.